This weekend is going to be 100% devoted to assignments. There is only 3 weeks of Museum Studies left, next week is going to be the worst but when it’s over I only have 5 assignments left to hand in and my exams until i’m in the free and clear.
I had a civilized talk with my mom today about school…not even any raised voices which was amazing. Now that I’ve convinced her, I just have to get through this next 4 weeks of class which right now seems impossible. I still have 13 assignments none of which are small plus exams, like fuck off Museum Studies seriously.
So I have decided to quit my program. Its not something I enjoy doing, I have never been unhappier in my whole life. Which is ridiculous because I should be enjoying my life now more than ever. I told my conservation teacher today that im dropping and he told me that school isnt always the answer and that he traveled around south africa for 3 years after high school and even after that he dropped out of graphic design after a year. So I am going to give myself the time to figure it out.
My research paper is getting done but the further I get into writing it the more information I find that should be included in other sections. An all nighter tommorow may be required to finsh this on time. Who knew paper and paint could be so complicated… What sucks is that the other section of my class has a whole other week to work on it. I cannot wait until this is handed in.
People pay ridiculous amounts of money that usually results in debt in order to go to school. How many classes do people even go to? and even if you do go to these classes how much do you really learn? The majority of my first year was a waste of time in which I didn’t learn anything that has to do with museum studies.. like group dynamics really? Secondly, even if your classes are useful you are now stressed out, overwhelmed and overworked by all these fucking assignments, work, and anything else that is going on in your life. So by this point your hating your life… now how many people really know what they want to do in the first place? I don’t know how to tell if this is what I want to do, how do you know? How do you find that thing that doesn’t feel like work and that you want to do even when it does because it is in some way fulfilling? It is possible, Ive seen people who actually love what they’re doing. Finally, even if you have figured out that this is what you want to do and you’ve actually gotten through school how many people even get jobs in what they studied for…everyone has a degree now a days! Unless you know someone or get some kind of lucky break its not really likely. Maybe I’m just totally pessimistic and wrong about this topic but I think this is the reality for a lot of people.